Brothers-in-arms Orion Pax and D-16 become sworn enemies Optimus Prime and Megatron.
Director: Josh Cooley
Brothers-in-arms Orion Pax and D-16 become sworn enemies Optimus Prime and Megatron.
Director: Josh Cooley
Godzilla and the almighty Kong face a colossal threat hidden deep within the planet, challenging their very existence and the survival of the human race.
Director: Adam Wingard
After reuniting with Gwen Stacy, Brooklyn's full-time, friendly neighborhood Spider-Man is catapulted across the Multiverse, where he encounters a team of Spider-People charged with protecting its very existence. However, when the heroes clash on how to handle a new threat, Miles finds himself pitted against the other Spiders. He must soon redefine what it means to be a hero so he can save the people he loves most.
Director: Joaquim Dos Santos, Kemp Powers, Justin K. Thompson
Ladybug is an unlucky assassin who's determined to do his job peacefully after one too many gigs has gone off the rails.
Director: David Leitch
Cast: Brad Pitt, Joey King, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Brian Tyree Henry, Andrew Koji, Hiroyuki Sanada, Michael Shannon, Benito A Martínez Ocasio, Sandra Bullock
Release Date: August 5, 2022
Genre: Action, Thriller
Rated R for strong and bloody violence, pervasive language, and brief sexuality.
Runtime: 2h 6m
Review:
Bullet Train doesn't deliver much in terms of story or characterization, instead it relies on spurts of hyper stylized violence and its cast endless charisma. David Leitch's film is choppier than his last two film, Deadpool 2 and Atomic Blonde, making the lulls in between the action set pieces much more noticeable and jarring. When those action set pieces kick in though they do offer some colorful and gleefully violent choreography that gives the film a boost of adrenaline. The biggest issue being that the remainder of the film's story and character backgrounds are told via flashy slow motion flashbacks with nearly every single character in the large ensemble getting a vignette. The majority of the character's themselves are incredibly thin with a handful popping up and off the screen with little more than a few lines of dialogue. The saving grace of it all is the cast who are clearly having a ball hamming it throughout the film's runtime. Brad Pitt leads the group giving a light, but fun turn as an operative who's looking for deeper meaning in his overly lethal life. Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Brian Tyree Henry prove to be standouts together with each of them bouncing dialogue off each other with incredible ease. They provide the most consistent and energetic characters making their time on screen some of the film's highpoints. Joey King looks the part but doesn't really add much to her character outside of what's written onscreen even though we're lead to believe she's smarter than nearly everyone. Hiroyuki Sanada and Michael Shannon have small supporting roles with both punching well under their class but providing the film some credibility even though Shannon is sporting a ridiculously impressive wig and accent. Bullet Train is the type of film that would have been more effective in a smaller package since it never earns it's two hour runtime and starts to sag noticeably in its final act. It's still a fairly fun throwback of sorts to those late 90's early 2000 Pulp Fiction knock offs like 2 Days In The Valley, Go or Smoking Aces with a dash of John Woo for good measure.
C+
The Eternals, a race of immortal beings with
superhuman powers who have secretly lived on Earth for thousands of years,
reunite to battle the evil Deviants.
Director: Chloé Zhao
Cast: Gemma Chan, Richard Madden, Kumail
Nanjiani, Lia McHugh, Brian Tyree Henry, Lauren Ridloff, Barry Keoghan, Don
Lee, Harish Patel, Kit Harington, Salma Hayek, Angelina Jolie
Release Date:
Genre: Action, Adventure, Drama, Fantasy,
Sci-Fi
Rated PG-13 for fantasy violence and action,
some language and brief sexuality.
Runtime: 2h 37m
Review:
Chloé Zhao’s Eternals is one of the more
interesting entries in the ongoing Marvel series. The mash up of Zhao’s naturalistic style and
superhero tropes results in a character focused film that’s more interested in
the smaller moments than big action sequences.
As such, it has a different feel than most of these films do while still
accomplishing the usual Marvel albeit at a glacial pace. It has an odd pace that drains the
proceedings of any urgency even though it’s literally dealing with end of the
world stakes. Intermixing flashbacks
with present day events drains the film of any sense of forward momentum since
neither section get enough time to gain any sort of real traction. Luckily the incredibly diverse cast makes the
slog more bearably with earnest performances.
Gemma Chan and Richard Madden do the heavy lifting for the majority of
the film with each providing a steady stoicism to their duo. The large
supporting cast each get their moments to shine during the film with Lia McHugh,
Brian Tyree Henry and Barry Keoghan leaving the biggest impressions. Angelina Jolie does well as the tortured
warrior whose being crushed under the weight of her memories. Salma Hayek gets a scant few moments to shine
but ultimately the film waste her with an underwritten role. Eternals tries hard to be sweeping and epic
but it never really achieves it, only skirting with it during it’s hefty
runtime.
B-
My dear reader(s), for the first time in what seems like a very long time, I have two reviews to share this weekend. My second film of the weekend was Netflix' the Woman in the Window.
An agoraphobic woman's credibility comes into question when she claims to have witnessed a terrible crime.
Spoiler level here will be mild, nothing you wouldn't know from the trailers.
Regular reader(s) will know for certain: I am not a movie snob. I'm addicted to the Expendables movies. I actually own that dreadful remake of Lost in Space. My annual top-ten list once included Gnomeo & Juliet *and* one of the Hotel Transylvania sequels (same year, don't judge). I do not believe the cinema is the only credible way to see new movies. I want Netflix, Amazon, and all the other streaming services to do well with their original films. BUT...the Woman in the Window definitely won't help Netflix be taken seriously as a purveyor of quality content.
I have not read the Woman in the Window. I understand filmmakers took some creative liberties with the book, but I can't say if that's what's to blame for this sad waste of a brilliant cast. Even putting my obsession with Gary Oldman aside, how can a movie go so wrong when it has Amy Adams? Julianne Moore? Brian Tyree Henry? Jennifer Jason Leigh? Anthony Mackie, for flip's sake?? I can't say exactly how, but it definitely does go very, very wrong indeed. Dialogue is so wooden that even this company of decorated, gifted actors might as well be reading from cards. The story itself skips around and fails to maintain any tension or mystery; the characters couldn't be more obvious if they were twirling cartoon moustaches. By the time it limps to its pitiful conclusion, you'll wish they all were murder victims, rather than potential witnesses.
The Woman in the Window runs a painful 100 minutes and is rated R for "violence and language."
The Woman in the Window is a criminal waste of an interesting concept and a superb group of actors. Of a possible nine Weasleys, the Woman in the Window gets two.
The Woman in the Window is now streaming on Netflix.
Fangirl points: My Gary (of course). MACKIE! Until next time...
PS: Just saw a headline that said "The Woman in the Window has two Captain Americas," and I can state with authority that that is the most interesting thing about it.
My dear reader(s), the week just passed brought us Godzilla vs. Kong, a film that — by its very name — made a return to the big screens of the cinema seem imperative.
Spoiler level here will be mild, nothing you wouldn't know from the trailers or if you've ever watched a monster movie before.
As the title indicates, Godzilla vs. Kong pits one giant creature against another, with puny humans serving as catalysts and comic relief.
A disclaimer: I wanted to see this movie on the big screen. I had every intention of seeing this movie on the big screen. I think this movie is 100% worth seeing on the big screen. BUT...for reasons including (but not limited to) Easter weekend always being crazy busy and my cinema still having weird Covid hours, I was forced to watch it on my reasonably-large television. *sadface*
For a movie like this to meet my needs, all it really has to do is have huge creatures, solid effects, and well choreographed battles. Plot doesn't mean much, and people are merely a distraction. Godzilla vs. Kong executes its mission to a "T." Both titular titans look very big and very, very good in this film. Showdowns between the two are magnificent. There are a fair number of consequential humans ("consequential," for my purposes, meaning named characters with at least a little dialogue), but the people are mostly unobtrusive, despite being portrayed by such notable names as Rebecca Hall, Brian Tyree Henry, Demian Bichir, Lance Reddick, Kyle Chandler, Millie Bobby Brown, and Alexander Skarsgard. Sound effects are nearly as impressive as visuals; however, in order to get the dialogue even barely audible, I had my volume so high that action sequences and music rattled the walls. I find that's the norm these days, both with movies and with television, and I have to think it can't be so hard to do better. Godzilla vs. Kong is fun and well paced, a series of epic action jewels strung together with thin human string. Oh, and the *real* titan here is Elvis Presley, whose "Loving Arms" makes a...peculiar...appearance.
Godzilla vs. Kong clocks in at 113 minutes and is rated PG13 for "intense sequences of creature violence/destruction and brief language."
If massive creatures, colossal clashes, and unimaginable destruction are your cup of tea, Godzilla vs. Kong is just the ticket. Of a possible nine Weasleys, Godzilla vs. Kong gets eight.
Godzilla vs. Kong is now playing in cinemas and streaming on HBO Max.
This review is dedicated to my wonderful friend David, a Godzilla scholar who has probably forgotten more about this character than I could ever know, and to my dad, who would have loved this movie more than anything.
Until next time...
Kong and his protectors undertake a perilous
journey to find his true home. Along for the ride is Jia, an orphaned girl who
has a unique and powerful bond with the mighty beast. However, they soon find
themselves in the path of an enraged Godzilla as he cuts a swath of destruction
across the globe. The initial confrontation between the two titans --
instigated by unseen forces -- is only the beginning of the mystery that lies
deep within the core of the planet.
Director: Adam Wingard
Cast: Alexander Skarsgård, Millie Bobby
Brown, Rebecca Hall, Brian Tyree Henry, Shun Oguri, Eiza González, Julian
Dennison, Lance Reddick, Kyle Chandler,
Demián Bichir
Release Date:
Genre: Action, Sci-Fi, Thriller
Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of
creature violence/destruction and brief language
Runtime: 1 h 53 min
Review:
Godzilla vs. Kong is the type of film that
is very open about what kind of film it is and it never pretends to be anything
else. Adam Wingard’s film uses the
thinnest of a story to get the action moving.
Wingard moves the film at a steady pace so that you don’t think about
the exposition heavy human sequences too much since it’s all fairly nonsensical. Wingard is smart enough to see that people
who sit down to see Godzilla vs. Kong want to see the two titans fight in epic
fashion. He delivers some truly
impressive action set pieces between the two behemoths in well staged
mayhem. These action sequences are the
primary lifeblood of the entire film so if they didn’t work the film would be a
failure. The human side of these films
are typically afterthoughts at best and the same holding true here. The cast is populated with familiar faces who
are barely straining one ounce of talent into their roles. Demián Bichir does manage to leave a lasting
impression in the villain role that’s only missing a dash of mustache
twirling. Deft actress Kaylee Hottle
leaves the biggest impression in a small but pivotal role. Her portion of the
story with Kong is the beefiest of story threads but it’s not explored in any
great depth. Godzilla vs. Kong isn’t the
type of film that’s interested in any sort of in depth storytelling just
massive mayhem and it delivers the big dumb action you’d expect from these types
of films.
B-