MOVIE REVIEW: EXPEND4BLES

Armed with every weapon they can get their hands on, the Expendables are the world's last line of defense and the team that gets called when all other options are off the table.

Director: Scott Waugh

Cast: Jason Statham, Sylvester Stallone, Dolph Lundgren, Randy Couture, Curtis "50 Cent" Jackson, Megan Fox, Tony Jaa, Iko Uwais, Jacob Scipio, Levy Tran, Andy García

Release Date: September 22, 2023 

Genre: Action, Adventure, Thriller, War

Rated R for strong/bloody violence throughout, language and sexual material.

Runtime: 1h 43m

The Expendables franchise has always leaned on 80's action nostalgia with its rotating collection of aging stars.  It seemed inevitable that it wouldn't be able to last forever as the big names slowly dropped off, killing off it's primary draw.  This fourth entry lacks the original hook leaving Jason Statham, Megan Fox and Randy Couture front and center, Stallone appears in what amounts to a glorified cameo.  Statham is generally good fun in supporting role or lead roles especially if he's got strong material.  Sadly the script, production and story overall is terribly lazy and undercooked leaving him to rely on his natural charisma which can only take the film so far.  Megan Fox is distractingly bad throughout, with the film asking us to believe she's a stone cold mercenary even while she's outfitted in clubwear with enough flawless make up caked on to make you think they shot her using an Instagram filter.  It's one of the many things that make the whole thing feel like a bottom shelf rental from the early 80s.  The new cast of characters are all fairly nondescript with 50 Cent acting like 50 Cent and Jacob Scipio giving a fairly terrible Antonio Banderas impersonation as his son.  Iko Uwais serves as the primary villain but he's saddled with pencil thin characterization with the only memorable moment coming in the final act with a well choregraphed fight with Statham which gives the film the slightest bit of a pulse.  The series, as a whole, has never been a bastion of high art but they were fun as mindless mayhem something this entry seems to have forgotten.  Expend4bles is sorely lacking in that department since there's nothing terribly fun about it which leaves it dead on arrival.

D-

MOVIE REVIEW: AQUAMAN

Once home to the most advanced civilization on Earth, the city of Atlantis is now an underwater kingdom ruled by the power-hungry King Orm. With a vast army at his disposal, Orm plans to conquer the remaining oceanic people -- and then the surface world. Standing in his way is Aquaman, Orm's half-human, half-Atlantean brother and true heir to the throne. With help from royal counselor Vulko, Aquaman must retrieve the legendary Trident of Atlan and embrace his destiny as protector of the deep.

Director: James Wan

Cast: Jason Momoa, Amber Heard, Willem Dafoe, Patrick Wilson, Dolph Lundgren, Yahya Abdul-Mateen II, Nicole Kidman

Release Date: December 14, 2018

Genres: Action, Adventure, Fantasy

Rated PG-13 for sequences of sci-fi violence and action, and for some language

Runtime: 2h 23 min

Review:

Aquaman is one of those properties that could have gone off the rails fairly easily much like Marvel’s Thor.  The best thing DC did was nail the casting much like they did with Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman.  Jason Momoa has great screen presence and he never takes himself overly serious.  He’s had a trial run with him making an impressive debut in Justice League and he proves that he’s more than capable of carrying his own film here.  The combination of James Wan and Jason Momoa make for an incredibly fun film which has a massive scope but it never loses its focus even as it becomes more and more ridiculous.  Wan does a healthy bit of world building delivering some incredibly impressive visual set pieces and action sequences.  After a bit of a slow start the film revs up and never let’s down, its energy is palpable through out even at nearly two in half hours.  The supporting cast rounds out the film with Amber Heard leaving the biggest impression with Nichole Kidman coming in a strong second.  It’s a testament to how well crafted the film is that you can overlook a few missteps like a bland villain, Black Manta would have worked better as the primary baddie, and some formulaic story beats.  Even so Aquaman is a superhero film that’s sure to please nearly everyone especially long suffering DC fans.  

A-

MOVIE REVIEW: CREED 2

In 1985, Russian boxer Ivan Drago killed former U.S. champion Apollo Creed in a tragic match that stunned the world. Against the wishes of trainer Rocky Balboa, Apollo's son Adonis Johnson accepts a challenge from Drago's son -- another dangerous fighter. Under guidance from Rocky, Adonis trains for the showdown of his life -- a date with destiny that soon becomes his obsession. Now, Johnson and Balboa must confront their shared legacy as the past comes back to haunt each man.

Director: Steven Caple Jr.

Cast: Michael B. Jordan, Sylvester Stallone, Tessa Thompson, Dolph Lundgren, Florian Munteanu, Wood Harris, Russell Hornsby, Andre Ward, Phylicia Rashad

Release Date: November 21, 2018

Genres: Drama, Sport

Rated PG-13 for sports action violence, language, and a scene of sensuality

Runtime: 2h 10 min

Review:

Creed 2 is a well acted and directed sequel that delivers what people expect from the Rocky films even though there’s a strict adherence to the tired and true tropes and beats.  Steven Caple Jr. does solid work stepping in for Ryan Coogler who brought the franchise back to life.  Caple Jr. gives his film enough artful touches to give it a distinctive feel which makes some of the more predictable moments easier to sit through.  The biggest thing this sequel has going for it is its cast lead by the incredibly charismatic Michael B. Jordan.  Jordan’s profile has risen quiet a bit since the first film came out and it’s well earned.  He feels much more comfortable in the roles and explores other aspects of the character’s psyche.  Tessa Thompson is just as comfortable this go around which leaves us with an incredibly watchable on screen couple.  The heart and soul of these films is still Sylvester Stallone this remains true here even though his role is limited.  Bringing back one of Rocky’s most iconic adversaries could have been a major misstep but luckily it’s handled nicely.  It’s an interesting turn that expands on what was, and still is, a cartoonish type of character.  Some of the Drago story threads still come off as a bit silly but the story really does an impressive job of adding some interesting depth to Drago.  Creed 2 isn’t quiet as impressive as Creed but it more than holds its own in the Rocky ring.

B

Cindy Prascik's Review of The Expendables 3

 

 

Dearest Blog, yesterday it was off to the pictures for something that gets me as excited as landing on The Nice List come Christmas Eve: a new Expendables movie.

Spoiler level here will be mild-ish, mostly nothing you wouldn't know from the trailers.

Barney adds some fresh faces to his team, in hopes of bringing down an old foe.

Reader(s), let's just get this out of the way: I think the Expendables franchise is the most awesomely awesome awesome in the history of awesome. I didn't love the second installment *quite* as well as the first--it felt a lot like throwing more names at the screen just to see what stuck--and trailers led me to fear the new one might be more of the same. While part three definitely does offer an expanded array of ass-kickers, I am happy to declare it the best of the franchise (so far).

Expendables 3 is non-stop action, spelled with brief bits of Feelings and quick frames of Other Things That Make Badasses Cool, such as riding motorcycles and doing shots. The Expendables get that the action is probably why you came, though, and they see to it you get your money's worth.
Daring vehicular stunts, massive weapons, and nicely-choreographed hand-to-hand combat occupy most of the screen time. As always, the cast is a who's who of action stars: Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Dolph Lundgren, Wesley Snipes, Terry Crews, Randy Couture, and Jet Li. Throw in Mel Gibson, Kelsey Grammer, Antonio Banderas, and Harrison Ford for good measure, and you've got yourself quite the crew.

The pitfall of a cast this size is that there's never quite enough of THAT ONE GUY you want to see more of (in my case, Statham, always), but the silver lining is that Harrison Ford is...well...Harrison Ford, and Banderas, in top comic form, completely steals the show. The young'uns are the most forgettable batch of low-watt never-will-bes this side of a Twilight movie--and I certainly could have done without the addition of a female Expendable--but the big guns thankfully have enough star power to go around. Though there was quite a fuss about keeping this installment tame enough for a PG13 rating (as opposed to the Rs earned by the first two Expendables flicks), the film doesn't suffer for it. Quite honestly, I can't imagine a more fun time at the movies.

The Expendables 3 clocks in at 126 minutes and is rated PG13 for "violence including intense sustained gun battles and fight scenes, and for language."

Of a possible nine Weasleys, The Expendables 3 gets eight. Oh, and Sly, dahhhling, you don't have to be 30 years younger to come knockin' on MY door.

Until next time..

 Shut up and take my money!

MOVIE REVIEW: THE EXPENDABLES 3

Barney (Stallone), Christmas (Statham) and the rest of the team comes face-to-face with Conrad Stonebanks (Gibson), who years ago co-founded The Expendables with Barney. Stonebanks subsequently became a ruthless arms trader and someone who Barney was forced to kill... or so he thought. Stonebanks, who eluded death once before, now is making it his mission to end The Expendables -- but Barney has other plans. Barney decides that he has to fight old blood with new blood, and brings in a new era of Expendables team members, recruiting individuals who are younger, faster and more tech-savvy. The latest mission becomes a clash of classic old-school style versus high-tech expertise in the Expendables' most personal battle yet. ~ Jeremy Wheeler, Rovi

Director: Patrick Hughes

Cast: Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Antonio Banderas, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren, Wesley Snipes

Release Date: Aug 15, 2014

Rated: PG-13 for Language, Intense Sustained Gun Battles, Fight Scenes and Violence 

Runtime: 2 hr. 7 min. 

Genres: Action/Adventure 

Review:

By this point in time you come to expect certain things from the Expendables movies.  The third entry starts off well with a rollicking, if a tad silly, action sequence that brings back Wesley Snipes to the screen.  Honestly, I didn’t know I missed Snipes that much but he perks up the first 20 minutes of the movie with an energetic charisma that’s hard to ignore.  After that sequence, the film turns into a bit of slog as we’re slowly introduced to new recruits, none of which have even the tiniest bit of screen charisma, with the characters we’ve come to know relegated to wait off screen.  The biggest sin isn’t that these characters are faceless and just there to serve the plot, it’s that during this extended sequence nothing happens.  There lots of exposition with Frasier popping up to throw some zingers at the plastic corpse that is Stallone but very little action or fun.  It’s honestly the films biggest drawback because the whole sequence could have been done in about 10 minutes so we could bring back the established fun characters or the other new additions like Antonio Banderas who’s hilarious as a motor mouth killer looking for a new team.  Once the final action sequence starts, you remember why your watching this film, lots over the top action with fun characters and crazy eyed Mel Gibson hamming it up as the villain of the piece.  That’s all I was really looking for in this franchise.

C+

MOVIE REVIEW: THE EXPENDABLES 2

IN THEATERS ON DVD

THE EXPENDABLES 2




The Expendables return with a vengeance in this follow-up to the 2010 surprise hit. The Mechanic's Simon West directed from a script by Sylvester Stallone and David Agosto. Liam Hemsworth heads up the rest of the starring cast, which includes returning members Jason Statham, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren, and Terry Crews, along with fellow '80s action icons Jean-Claude Van Damme and Chuck Norris. ~ Jason Buchanan, Rovi

Director: Simon West

Cast: Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren, Chuck Norris, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Bruce Willis, Liam Hemsworth

Release Date: Aug 17, 2012

Rated R for Strong Bloody Violence

Runtime: 1 hr. 43 min.

Genres: Action/Adventure

Review:

You can’t accuse the sequel to Expendables of not delivering on what it promised. Stallone’s brain child brought a litany of action stars together for the first film and with this second one he ups the ante across the board. Simon West takes over the director’s reigns this go around but it has a very similar feel to the first. The action is extreme and outlandish, very tongue in cheeks almost bordering on self parody occasionally. During the fast and loose action sequences the film finds its groove, allowing its cast to shine doing what they do best, kick ass. Pacing problems due kind of plague the film as West transitions from huge action set pieces to slower almost glacial story moments which change the films tone from fun to overly self serious. It’s most bothersome in the first part of the film which has more exposition than is actually needed for such a simple conceit. Around the midway point the, once the lone wolf shows up, film perks up again leading to a fun and enjoyable finale which features Stallone, Willis and Schwarzenegger doing what they do best, playing off each other extremely well. Jason Statham is the lone primary star from the first film who gets more than passing face time. As a sequel it delivers bigger bang for the buck even if it isn’t perfect.

B-