An ordinary suburban couple (Zach Galifianakis and Isla Fisher) discover
that their hospitable new neighbors (Jon Hamm and Gal Gadot) are actually
government spies. Soon, all four of them are caught up in an international
espionage imbroglio. Greg Mottola (Superbad, Adventureland) directed this
action comedy. ~ Daniel Gelb, Rovi
Director:Greg Mottola
Cast: Zach Galifianakis, Jon Hamm, Isla Fisher, Gal
Gadot, Matt Walsh
Release Date: Oct
21, 2016
Rated PG-13 for
Genres: Comedy
Review:
Keeping up with the Jones is a fun little comedy.As a spy movie satire it’ll never live to
last year’s Spy or even Mr. & Ms. Smith which it borrows heavily from as
well.Still, it’s light and breezy
direction by Greg Mottola makes for an enjoyable if inconsequential
comedy.Its biggest strength is its
cast.The foursome of Zach Galifianakis,
Jon Hamm, Isla Fisher & Gal Gadot are likeable throughout with each shining
at one point or another. The plot in of itself is thread bare with nary a
surprise in sight.This oversight does
leave the film lingering past its expiration point.It’s a shame because with a slightly better
script and plot this could have been something special.
Dearest Blog: Yesterday it was off to Marquee Cinemas for the newest installment in Tom Cruise's Jack Reacher franchise, Never Go Back.
Spoiler level here will be mild, nothing of consequence that wasn't revealed in the trailers.
Attempting to prove the innocence of an Army Major accused of espionage, our hero finds himself embroiled in a high-reaching conspiracy while facing off with a secret from his past.
As I spent quality time with my best friend the Internet this morning, I saw a fair few headlines along the lines of, "How Can the Jack Reacher Franchise be Fixed?" and I thought, "Come on, Internet, we're only on the second installment!"
At any rate, I'm not sure the thing needs a complete overhaul, but a few tweaks are definitely in order.
Never Go Back is a predictable action flick where everybody does pretty much exactly what you'd expect.
That's not always a bad thing, but there were a few cases here where I really, really wished they hadn't, in particular the tried and true plot mechanism: "bratty teenager continually risks everyone's safety with foolish behavior." The kid, in general, was an annoying and pointless addition to this sequel, and, should there be more Jack Reachers, I hope she never turns up again.
On the plus side, the ass-kicking is also exactly what you'd have expected, that is, AWESOME! The movie wastes little time getting started, and features great end-to-end action with exciting chase scenes and well-choreographed fights. The backdrop of New Orleans' spectacular Halloween parade makes the climax especially fun.
Tom Cruise capably carries the lot on his shoulders, alternately heroic and funny, ever the ideal leading man. Cobie Smulders is passable in the female lead, nothing special in a nothing-special part.
The real star of the show is Patrick Heusinger, who somehow manages to be mesmerizing in a blandly typical baddie role. Despite having a true Hollywood A-Lister in the lead, Never Go Back ultimately feels very low-budget, like maybe Cruise (who has the top producer's credit) did what he could out of his own pocket, but might have benefited from a little more help.
Jack Reacher: Never Go Back clocks in at 118 minutes and is rated PG13 for "sequences of violence and action, some bloody images, language, and thematic elements."
Jack Reacher: Never Go Back could be the poster child for unnecessary sequels, but it's also a pretty good time.
Of a possible nine Weasleys, Jack Reacher: Never Go Back gets six and a half.
Fangirl points: Holt McCallany, Aldis Hodge, and Robert Knepper, who earns senior billing but barely earns a paycheck in a total of about five minutes onscreen.
Dearest Blog: Yesterday it was off to Marquee Cinemas to see my Bat!Boyfriend's new flick, The Accountant.
Spoiler level here will be mild, nothing you wouldn't know from the trailers.
A CPA with a dangerous clientele handles more than just the books.
The Accountant is a mystery/thriller with a protagonist who may be difficult to warm up to. It's unhurried and often uncomfortable due to the aforementioned protagonist's failure to respond/react to certain situations in the "normal" way. Sound familiar?
If you saw The Girl on the Train last weekend, I'm sure it does. However, unlike The Girl on the Train, The Accountant boasts well-plotted action, solid performances, a couple nice twists, and is funny only when it means to be.
The titular savant, Christian Wolff, is unable to deal normally with people, but his mathematical genius is invaluable to his unsavory clients. Ben Affleck perfectly portrays the mannerisms typical of autism spectrum disorders, creating a character who is sympathetic even when he's doing some pretty bad things.
Jon Bernthal, J.K. Simmons, and John Lithgow are terrific in supporting roles, and Cynthia Addai-Robinson is a pleasant surprise as the FBI agent hot on the tail of our mysterious money manager. (I've always thought she was one of the worst actors working, but maybe when you're on Spartacus there's just nothing for it!)
The Accountant is brutal at times, certainly not for the faint of heart. There's a short spell right about the hour mark where the movie starts to drag a little, but it picks right back up and is otherwise deliberately-paced but never dull.
Wolff's inappropriate and seemingly rude interactions with people and situations outside his comfort zone spell the dark tone with amusing moments that are never a mean spirited laugh "at" autism or its manifestations.
The movie could have explained itself better in a few spots, and the runtime might have benefitted from a trim, but The Accountant is a suspenseful yarn that'll keep you on the edge of your seat.
The Accountant clocks in at 128 minutes and is rated R for "strong violence and language throughout."
The Accountant is a solid thriller featuring satisfying twists and a standout performance by Ben Affleck.
Of a possible nine Weasleys, The Accountant gets eight.
Dearest Blog: Yesterday it was off to Marquee Cinemas for the buzzkill double-bill of The Girl on the Train and The Birth of a Nation.
Spoiler level here will be mild, nothing you wouldn't know from the trailers.
First on the docket: The Girl on the Train.
An unhappy divorcee makes up stories about the people she sees on her daily commute, then becomes entangled in the case when one of them goes missing.
The Girl on the Train is such a pedestrian mystery that, never having been anywhere near the novel, it took me approximately 23 minutes to clock exactly how it was going to play out...and that was far from my final check of the time, believe me.
Emily Blunt plays the titular girl as a sloppy, irritating drunk, and the supporting characters are so odious it's impossible to care what happens to any of them. (Though I'd forgive Luke Evans for pretty much anything once he started peeling off those clothes.)
A few laughable bits--including a full-on Cameron Frye moment in a gallery--spell a miserable whole that plods along with varying versions of events. Who's telling the truth? Who's lying?
You'll stop caring long before this mess crawls to its predictable finish. About the only things The Girl on the Train has to recommend it are a properly menacing score by Danny Elfman and a couple frames of Evans' glorious bod.
The Girl on the Train runs an excruciating 112 minutes and is rated R for "violence, sexual content, language, and nudity."
The Girl on the Train is a slow, dull exercise that made me want to throw myself on the tracks.
Of a possible nine Weasleys, The Girl on the Train gets four.
Fangirl points: Luke Evans. Luke Evans' abs. Luke Evans' bottom.
Also, a girl in a Damned shirt...yay!
Next up: The Birth of a Nation.
The true story of Nat Turner, a slave and preacher who orchestrated a rebellion in 1831.
The Birth of a Nation is difficult to watch, and more than once I had to look away from the brutality and abuse. Performances are fantastic across the board, with Nate Parker and Aja Naomi King outstanding in the leads, and Armie Hammer his usual reliable self in an important supporting role.
Turner's Christian faith is central to the story, but the movie also exposes the contradictory nature of the Bible and those who presume to speak for their gods.
The subject matter is unpleasant enough to make the film feel much longer than it is; for the duration I kept thinking the last thing we really need right now is yet another reminder of how horrible people can be to one another.
Only afterward did it occur to me, maybe exactly what we need right now is a reminder of what happens when people are encouraged to treat others as less than themselves.
The Birth of a Nation clocks in at an even two hours and is rated R for "disturbing violent content and some brief nudity."
The Birth of a Nation is a well-acted picture with a timely, important message, but, sadly, none of that makes it a truly great movie.
Of a possible nine Weasleys, The Birth of a Nation gets five. .
Fangirl points: The aforementioned Armie Hammer. Mark Boone Junior (Bobby Elvis)!
In the thriller, Rachel (Blunt), who is devastated by her recent divorce,
spends her daily commute fantasizing about the seemingly perfect couple who
live in a house that her train passes every day, until one morning she sees
something shocking happen there and becomes entangled in the mystery that
unfolds. Based on Paula Hawkins’ bestselling novel, The Girl on the Train is
adapted for the screen by Erin Cressida Wilson and Taylor. The film’s executive
producers are Jared LeBoff and Celia Costas, and it will be released by
Universal Pictures.
Rated R for violence, sexual content, language and nudity
Genres: Suspense/Thriller
Review:
Is it possible to make an interesting movie with a cast
of characters who are all unlikable and fairly terrible?The Girl on the Train tries really hard to
pull it off and has a decent amount of success even if the “mind blowing” twist
is telegraphed fairly early on.Tate
Taylor is clearly trying to emulate David Fincher’s Gone Girl but he’s not as
talented a filmmaker to make it work.As
is, the film is a surprisingly engrossing tale of bad people doing bad things
repeatedly.Taylor’s
real talent is getting some truly impressive performances out of his cast
especially Emily Blunt.Blunt is
incredibly impressive throughout with multiple scenes set up to showcase her
acting chops.Haley Bennett, who looks
distractingly like a Jennifer Lawrence clone, is just solid even though her
character feels unwritten.It’s a shame
because the character seems to be most interesting of the group.The Girl on the Train is trying it’s hardest
to be some special but it never quite gets there.
After a family tragedy, a boy named Jake (Asa Butterfield) follows a series
of clues that lead him to a mysterious orphanage on a remote Welsh island.
There, he discovers a community of children with unusual abilities, and learns
he is destined to protect them. Eva Green, Samuel L. Jackson, Kim Dickens,
Allison Janney, Judi Dench, Chris O'Dowd, Rupert Everett, and Terence Stamp
co-star. Directed by Tim Burton, Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children
was adapted from Ransom Riggs' debut novel of the same name. ~ Daniel Gelb,
Rovi
Director: Tim Burton
Cast: Eva Green, Asa Butterfield, Chris O'Dowd, Allison
Janney, Judi Dench
Release Date: Sep
30, 2016
Rated PG-13 for violence and Peril and Intense Fantasy
Action
Runtime: 2 hr. 7 min.
Genres: Action/Adventure, Family, Sci-Fi/Fantasy
Review:
Tim Burton’s newest film is a
welcome return to his glory days as a director.The book seems ready made for Burton and give a certain feel that works in the films favor.The cast seems to be having a blast, for the
most part, with a radiant Eva Green leading the way.Green is always the most interesting person
on screen and the film loses some pop when she’s not on screen especially
during an extended absence in the final act.Ella Purnell gives the best performance of the titular peculiar
children.It’s a shame her story and
character isn’t fleshed out more.Also
not helping matters is the film’s male lead.Asa Butterfield is possibly one of the blandest actors I’ve watched in a
long time.His line deliver is so stiff
and uninspired that it almost feels like he might yawn in the middle of
it.On the other end of the spectrum is
Samuel L. Jackson who’s so over the top that’s its jarring when he first shows
up.Its not good or bad just odd.Equally odd is just how thinly written the
villain is.It’s a shame because with a
better lead and more dynamic villain this might have been scratching the top
tier of Burton films.
Dearest Blog: Yesterday it was off to Marquee Cinemas for a double-bill of Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children and Deepwater Horizon.
Spoiler level here will be mild, nothing you wouldn't know from the trailers or perhaps the news.
First up: Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children.
Some characters straight out of his grandfather's bedtime stories turn a young man's ordinary existence upside-down.
It goes without saying that a story with "peculiar" in the title is ideally suited to director Tim Burton. All of Burton's more recent projects have earned critical ire (mostly deserved), and, if Miss Peregrine isn't quite the Burton of old, at least it seems to be a step in the right direction.
The film boasts glorious production design, some lovely set pieces, and stunning locations; Burton has not lost his ability to find beauty in even the strangest and most macabre things. Colleen Atwood's costumes and a wonderful score by Michael Higham and Matthew Margeson perfectly compliment the eerie atmosphere.
Unfortunately, though the story is compelling, the movie seems to crawl along at a snail's pace. There's too little of the stellar Eva Green (who was born for this role), and too much of the bland child cast.
Asa Butterfield is perfectly dreadful in the lead; he might as well have been reading from cards. Nothing points to 3D being a worthwhile investment on this one, aside from the fact that, in 2D, the movie's often too dark to see what's happening.
Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children clocks in at 127 minutes and is rated PG13 for "intense sequences of fantasty action/violence, and peril."
Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children is visually impressive enough to earn your big-screen dollars, but, sadly it's also something no idea so magical should ever be: kinda boring.
Of a possible nine Weasleys, Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar children gets five.
Fangirl points: Keep your eyes open for a rare and delightful Tim Burton cameo!
Next up, the based-on-true-events tale of Deepwater Horizon.
An explosion on a free-floating offshore drilling rig has disastrous consequences.
Dear reader(s), Deepwater Horizon is one of those movies whose trailer was so ubiquitous and irritating that I worried the movie wouldn't have a chance of overcoming it, but I'm pleased to report my concern was mostly unfounded.
Mark Wahlberg stars as Mike Williams, a technician on the rig who is central to this telling of the story. We're introduced to his insufferably cutesy wife and daughter (Kate Hudson and Stella Allen), then to most of the rig's crew through his eyes, giving viewers just enough of each person to make sure they'll be acceptably sad for the unlucky ones.
The supporting cast has a fair few familiar faces: Kurt Russell, John Malkovich, and my celebrity boyfriend (per a super-scientific Buzzfeed quiz) Dylan O'Brien. There's enough setup to make it clear who're the Good Guys and the Bad Guys, and then--BOOM!--disaster.
The film doesn't waste too much time getting there and, to its credit, moves along nicely throughout. The bulk of the picture plays out as the rig's situation deteriorates and crew members try to save themselves and others. Deepwater Horizon does a perfect 180 from its advertising, showing individuals behaving heroically, minus the frustrating chest-thumping vibe of the trailer.
The movie's disaster effects are spectacular, with sound mixing and editing in particular deserving full marks. It's a bit dark and jiggly at times, but that only adds to viewers' ability to share the terror the folks aboard that rig must have felt.
Two small and random quibbles: Did Williams' wife really take time to do her nails over the course of these harrowing hours?
They're pink the whole movie, then a French manicure when she and their daughter reconnect with him at the hotel following the rescue. Also, looking at photos of the crew next to the actors portraying them, I'm thinking my wish to have Beyonce star in the story of my life isn't so unrealistic after all.
Deepwater Horizon runs 107 minutes and is rated PG13 for "prolonged, intense disaster sequences and related disturbing images, and brief strong language."
Deepwater Horizon might have been better suited to summer's action season than to awards season, but it's an edge-of-your-seat tale that hopefully will make the world more cautious and aware going forward.
Of a possible nine Weasleys, Deepwater Horizon gets six.
