Cindy Prascik's Reviews of Heart of Stone & Red, White & Royal Blue

My dear reader(s), my movie diet this past weekend was cheesier than an extra-large Wisconsin six-cheese pie from Domino's, but unfortunately not all of it was quite so delicious.

Spoiler level here will be mild, nothing you wouldn't know from the trailers, aside from one non-plot-specific quote that earned itself a little spotlight.

First on my weekend agenda, Heart of Stone, starring Gal Gadot as a member of a shadowy agency charged with keeping a powerful weapon out of hackers' hands.

Boasting the wonderful Gadot and a likeable, familiar collection of supporting players, Heart of Stone had the potential to be the kind of dumb fun that passes a great summer afternoon. Unfortunately, the plot is lazy and predictable, the action is by the numbers, and much of the dialogue is so bad I was embarrassed for all involved. Top it with an overwrought score and excessive runtime, and, well, it's just a terrible waste of a solid cast and a good (if oft-used) premise.

Heart of Stone clocks in at 122 minutes and is rated PG13 for "sequences of violence and action and some language."

Heart of Stone attempts to build a franchise atop an impossibly weak foundation. Of a possible nine Weasleys, Heart of Stone gets two.

Heart of Stone is now streaming on Netflix.

Next on my weekend agenda, the romcom Red, White & Royal Blue, a tale of forbidden romance between an English prince and the US President's son.

Me? Watching a romcom? Ye gods.

Red, White & Royal Blue is a sweet, funny tale that is no worse for being exactly what you expect at nearly every turn. Any romance rises and falls on its principals, and this one shines mainly due to the exceptional appeal and chemistry of its central couple, portrayed by Nicholas Galitzine and Taylor Zakhar Perez. 

They are a delight! The movie is often laugh-out-loud funny, with the bulk of the credit there going to Sarah Shahi as the President's harried Deputy Chief of Staff, and special mention to Uma Thurman, who had me on the floor with the President's "Mom" speech. There's no denying Red, White & Royal Blue is a bit Hallmarkey in its execution. The acting is a little rough at times, and some of the music placement feels awkward, but those are petty quibbles with a movie that left me with a smile that hasn't faded a day later. 

Finally, and maybe most importantly, "He grabbed my hair in a way that made me understand the difference between rugby and football" has to be in the running for movie quote of the year. I don't make the rules.

Red, White & Royal Blue runs 118 minutes and is rated R for "some sexual content, partial nudity, and language."

Red, White & Royal Blue is a predictable romantic comedy elevated by a charming cast and some hilarious dialogue. Of a possible nine Weasleys, Red, White & Royal Blue gets eight. (I'll be watching it again today.)

Fangirl points: Clifton Collins, Jr.!!

Red, White & Royal Blue is now streaming on Amazon Prime Video.

Until next time...

MOVIE REVIEW: THE LAST VOYAGE OF THE DEMETER

 

Dracula's unholy presence dooms the crew of the merchant ship Demeter as it sails from Carpathia to London.

Director: André Øvredal

Cast: Corey Hawkins, Aisling Franciosi, Liam Cunningham, David Dastmalchian, Javier Botet

Release Date: August 11, 2023

Genre: Horror

Rated R for bloody violence

Runtime: 1h 58m

There's a built in predictability ingrained in The Last Voyage of the Demeter due to the nature of the story. However, the cast and crew do an admirable job of delivering some tension and thrills.  André Øvredal film borrow heavily from Ridley Scott's original Alien in terms of set up and structure, so much so that's hard to tell if it’s an homage or just straight up plagiarism, an early discussion about bonuses kind of leans me toward the latter.  Either way, Øvredal's self-assured style delivers a glossy, well shot film that establishes the setting and mood early on by keeping the monster in the shadows until the midpoint of the film.  The monster itself uses Count Orlok's design from 1922's Nosferatu as its basis which gives him a more animalistic and menacing look.  It makes the character a tangible threat to the collected human chum assembled for his feeding.  Corey Hawkins and Liam Cunningham lead the cast with deadly serious turns as the ship’s doctor and doomed captain.  They both deliver stoic, committed performances that make the film far more watchable than it deserves to be since the script doesn't flesh them too much.  They still manage to make the characters interesting enough to make the audience care about their wellbeing.  Aisling Franciosi and David Dastmalchian don't fare quite as well in supporting roles as they struggle to make their characters come off as more than one dimensional.  They do the best they can with underwritten characters but your left with the sense that some depth would have added to the overall quality of the film.  Ultimately, The Last Voyage of the Demeter is the very definition of disposable entertainment which delivers just enough to keep you entertained during its runtime, but it'll be quickly forgotten shortly thereafter.  

C+

MOVIE REVIEW: STRAYS

Abandoned on the mean city streets by his lowlife owner, Doug, a naive but lovable dog named Reggie falls in with a fast-talking, foul-mouthed Boston Terrier and his gang of strays. Determined to seek revenge, Reggie and his new canine pals embark on an epic adventure to get him home and make Doug pay for his dirty deed.

Director: Josh Greenbaum

Cast: Will Ferrell, Jamie Foxx, Will Forte, Isla Fisher, Randall Park, Josh Gad, Harvey Guillén, Rob Riggle, Brett Gelman, Jamie Demetriou, Sofía Vergara

Release Date: August 2, 2023

Genre: Animation, Adventure, Comedy

Rated R for pervasive language, crude and sexual content, and drug use.

Runtime: 1h 33m

There's a pretty long history of talking animals family films from The Adventures of Milo and Otis, Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey to more recent entries like A Dog's Purpose which are generally wholesome affairs.  Strays takes the general concept and delivers a raunchy comedy which leans heavily on gross out humor with uneven results.  Josh Greenbaum's film delivers some laughs throughout its brisk runtime but it never really finds a consistent groove since some set ups work better than others.  When it works, there are some genuinely funny moments but when they don't they fall noticeably flat which is a shame since the main foursome is made up of strong comedic talents.  Will Ferrell, Jamie Foxx, Isla Fisher and Randall Park deliver fun performances as the motley crew that embarks on the journey.  The four of them deliver lines with a snappy ease that you'd expect with experienced performers with Foxx delivering the most consistent turn.  Ferrell's role seems perfectly suited for his style but the script doesn't let his character let loose as much as you'd expect which keeps him reined in from his classic freak out mode.  Isa Fisher and Randall Park are fun in supporting roles with Fisher proving to be the film's secret weapon.  The four share solid chemistry together but they never really hit their stride because the script uses gross out humor way too much for my taste.  Its a shame because there's plenty to satirize about the genre, something do in passing with a recurring bit about a narrating dog and a very specific cameo.  That's not to say there aren't laughs to be had in Strays but a bit of variety in the comedy would have made it more memorable overall. 

C+

MOVIE REVIEW: TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES: MUTANT MAYHEM

 

After years of being sheltered from the human world, the Turtle brothers set out to win the hearts of New Yorkers and be accepted as normal teenagers. Their new friend, April O'Neil, helps them take on a mysterious crime syndicate, but they soon get in over their heads when an army of mutants is unleashed upon them.

Director: Jeff Rowe

Cast: Micah Abbey, Shamon Brown Jr., Nicolas Cantu, Brady Noon, Hannibal Buress, Rose Byrne, John Cena, Jackie Chan, Ice Cube, Natasia Demetriou, Ayo Edebiri, Giancarlo Esposito, Post Malone, Seth Rogen, Paul Rudd, Maya Rudolph

Release Date: August 2, 2023

Genre: Comedy, Sci-fi, Animation 

Rated PG sequences of violence and action, language and impolite material

Runtime: 1h 39m

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem is an energetic reboot that breathes new life into the long running franchise.  Jeff Rowe's film has a kinetic energy from the start and he manages to maintain that level throughout.  The animation style and characters designs are beautifully rendered with a grungy style that makes each scene pop.  They're inventively done to give them a fresh new vibe while staying true to their classic designs.  Using real teenagers to voice the titular trio pays dividends since Micah Abbey, Shamon Brown Jr., Nicolas Cantu and Brady Noon all have great chemistry together.  Their youthful energy comes through as they bounce off each other naturally.  It helps that the script is snappily written even if its not terribly deep, light and straightforward but genuinely funny.  Ayo Edebiri makes for a fun April O'Neal who still a stalwart report but just can't handle her nerves on screen.  The rest of the supporting cast is made up of stars clearly having a ball voicing the slew of mutants that pop up on screen.  Jackie Chan and Ice Cube get the largest play with both delivering hilarious turns as the mentor and villain.  The cast provides a fun dynamic which works throughout making Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem a fun lighthearted animated ride that's sure to make long time fans happy and make new ones at the same time.  

 

B+

MOVIE REVIEW: TALK TO ME

 

When a group of friends discovers how to conjure spirits by using an embalmed hand, they become hooked on the new thrill -- until one of them unleashes terrifying supernatural forces.

Director: Danny Philippou, Michael Philippou

Cast:  Sophie Wilde, Alexandra Jensen, Joe Bird, Otis Dhanji, Miranda Otto, Zoe Terakes, Chris Alosio, Marcus Johnson, Alexandria Steffensen

Release Date: July 28, 2023

Genre: Horror Thriller

Rated R for strong/bloody violent content, some sexual material and language throughout

Runtime: 1h 35m

Talk to Me is slick enough to make for an entertaining thrill ride but its only sporadically scary and hampered by predictable turns and characters who make the worst possible decisions.  Danny Philippou and Michael Philippou direct their debut film with a surprisingly confident hand as they deliver an efficient film that sets up its scares with an energetic verve that's impressive.  They don't waste much time setting the table before they move into the general premise of the story which is effectively dumb kids keep messing with a Ouija Board type deal.  They make strong use of sound design and camera moves to give each sequence a disorienting feel with each moment capped off with shocks or brutality.  This isn't the kind of horror film that's subtle or nuanced instead it's more interested in old school approaches to make you jump or squirm.  The brothers touch on interesting concepts throughout like possession going viral or reality bending moments but they never lean into them enough to make the most of those moments.  The script suffers from a similarly scattered approach as it switches its thematic focus from one theme to another which feels like a missed opportunity.  The film moves at such a steady pace that it's easy to overlook these faults especially since the cast is fully committed especially Sophie Wilde in the lead role.  Wilde's large expressive eyes work perfectly for the role as she gives her a character a simmering unresolved pain that feel authentic.  The supporting cast isn't asked to do much but Miranda Otto makes the most of her moments onscreen by giving her character a nice bit of depth.  Ultimately, Talk to Me is the kind of film that wears its inspirations on its sleeve for better or worse since it makes for some solid moments but not very many surprises.

 

C+

MOVIE REVIEW: THEY CLONED TYRONE

 

A series of eerie events thrusts an unlikely trio onto the trail of a nefarious government conspiracy.

Director: Juel Taylor

Cast: John Boyega, Teyonah Parris, Jamie Foxx,  David Alan Grier, Kiefer Sutherland

Release Date: July 14, 2023 

Genre: Action, Comedy, Mystery, Sci-Fi, Thriller

Rated R for pervasive language, violence, some sexual material and drug use

Runtime: 2h 2m

Juel Taylor's directorial debut is a surprisingly funny and effective amalgam of some tried and true sci-fi tropes paired with an old school blaxploitation feel.  Its gritty look and feel immediately echo those 70s films as it starts out as a fairly straight forward urban crime drama before it reveals something more insidious lurking underneath.  John Boyega plays the titular drug dealer with a steely hardened facade with hints of emotional depth scattered throughout his journey.  He's the straight man to Jamie Foxx and Teyonah Parris bigger more cartoonish roles which makes for a fun dynamic once the trio start their investigation into craziness of their situation.  Foxx is in rare form here as he unleashes his comedic talents onscreen with the sort of unrestrained energy were his trademark of his early career.  Parris is having just as much fun as the Nancy Drew loving, soon to be retired proustite.  Their Motley Scooby Doo crew make the film work far better than it should since the reveals are fairly predictable.  That's not to say the script doesn't have a lot to say, it does, but the messaging gets a bit jumbled in its messy final act which borrows bits from Black Dynamite, Dark City and Westworld.  While it doesn't stick the landing, They Clone Tyrone does so much right that you can't help but appreciate this initial effort from Taylor and his cast, enough to make the tease at the end all the more intriguing.

B