Dearest Blog: Today it was off to Marquee Cinemas to see my beloved Gary Oldman's latest picture, The Space Between Us.
Spoiler level here will be mild, nothing you wouldn't know from the trailers.
A boy born and raised on Mars yearns to come to Earth.
Well, dear reader(s), I can't sugar coat it: The Space Between Us might be the worst movie I've ever seen. Almost everything about this film is so embarrassingly terrible that it's hard to know where to start, so, just to keep you on your toes, I'll start with the few things I actually liked. First, Gary looks amazing. Like, even-better-than-Air-Force-One amazing. He's in the movie a LOT more than I expected, too. I thought he'd be on the periphery of the main story between the two kids, but actually he's kinda the star, with commensurate screen time (which he already may be regretting). There's some lovely scenery as our kids traverse the country, a handful of genuinely funny/cute moments (though few and far between), and a few bits of the score that really caught my ear. That's the good news. The bad news is this movie is otherwise awful to the last detail. It sells its premise so poorly that you're laughing at the very idea before it really even gets started. Awkward, hokey dialogue sounds like it was written by someone who has never heard a real person speak before. It's hard to fault the actors, given the material, but nobody does anything to elevate this mess, either. Mostly what we've got here is two hours of smitten teens acting all teeny and adults scampering around, overwrought, in the most predictable series of events ever. On the Gary Oldman scale, it's about as bad as Lost in Space.
The Space Between us clocks in at an interminable 120 minutes and is rated PG13 for "brief sensuality and language."
As always, I encourage everyone to get out to the movies this weekend. Please just go see something besides The Space Between Us. Of a possible nine Weasleys, The Space Between Us gets one, for giving me my Gary on the big screen.
Struggling actress Mia (Emma Stone) and aspiring jazz pianist Sebastian
(Ryan Gosling) begin a whirlwind romance as they both pursue their dreams in Los
Angeles. However, their blossoming relationship is
challenged when their careers pull them in different directions. Damien
Chazelle (Damien Chazelle) wrote and directed this musical love story, which
co-stars John Legend, J.K. Simmons, and Rosemarie DeWitt. ~ Daniel Gelb, Rovi
Director: Damien Chazelle
Cast: Ryan Gosling, Emma Stone, John Legend, Finn
Wittrock, J.K. Simmons
Release Date: Dec
09, 2016
Rated PG-13 for some Language
Runtime: 2 hr. 7 min.
Genres: Comedy, Drama, Music/Performing Arts
Review:
La La Land is a rousing bit of filmmaking which is as
fizzy and bubbly as the best champagne.Like said champagne, it is a bit light on body.Instead Damien Chazelle dresses up his retro
musical with impressive shots and flashy choreography.It’s an incredibly fun film, especially in
the first 2 acts, with two magnetic leads.Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone bring a dizzying sense of adorableness to
their roles.You can’t help but get
sucked into this love story as their relationship begins to blossom and
grow.It’s an engrossing experience but
once you peel back all the frills it’s a pretty bare bones love story tinged
with a palatable sense of bitter sweetness.Still it’s a credit to Damien Chazelle that he could take a simple story
and infuse so much energy and passion into it.Is it the best film I’ve ever seen, not even close, but it’s a still
fine piece of film making.
Dearest Blog: After missing out last week, this weekend it was off to Marquee Cinemas for four--yes, FOUR--big-screen blasts.
Spoiler level here will be mild, nothing you wouldn't know or have guessed from the trailers.
First on my agenda: Resident Evil: The Final Chapter.
Alice makes a last(ish) stand against the Umbrella Corporation.
With this ostensibly "final" chapter of Resident Evil coming so quickly on the heels of Underworld's potential finale, for me it was inevitable to draw comparisons between the two badass-broad-fronted movies. I think Resident Evil comes up on the short end, but it's still a fun watch.
Like Underworld: Blood Wars, RE6 kicks off with a refresher on how we got to where we are. In both cases, this proved a waste of time. These movies do a good enough job of (over)explaining themselves as they go along that a person wouldn't be too lost to enjoy, regardless of what he did or didn't remember. It's to Milla Jovovich's benefit that acting chops are immaterial, as she acrobatically faces off with living and undead. Iain Glen is about as subtle a baddie as Snidely Whiplash. Though it's hard, these days, not to see him as the perpetually-friendzoned Ser Jorah Mormont, he does his best to prove himself a Wicked, Wicked Person here. The 2D effects are nothing to write home about, and certainly nothing to recommend the 3D upcharge and headache. There's some nice disaster footage (think Deepwater Horizon, if everybody hated the undead instead of the planet), and some truly wacky stunts, but much of the action is so dark all you can do is cross your fingers and hope your favorite character is still standing when it finally gets light again. Clumsy storytelling makes the film feel overlong. There's a nice thank-you message from director and star before the show, and, if it turns out this really is The End, it's a satisfying--if hokey--finish.
Resident Evil: The Final Chapter runs 106 minutes and is rated R for "sequences of violence throughout."
The premise is less interesting and the cast less enjoyable than Underworld, but Resident Evil: The Final Chapter is big, dumb fun. Of a possible nine Weasleys, Resident Evil: The Final Chapter gets four.
Next on the docket, xXx: The Return of Xander Cage.
The original Triple X is back in business.
Well, dear reader(s)... Now. We. Are. Talking. Were you in the market for a great, fun actioner? Well, you found it! xXx: The Return of Xander Cage is filled with absurd stunts, good-natured humor, pretty faces, and hardbodies all 'round. The plot obviously won't tax those little grey cells too much, but there are a few nice surprises wrapped around edge-of-your-seat action and a truly likable cast. And did I mention ridiculous stunts? Over the top in the most fun way. Vin Diesel knows his niche as well as any actor, and, while there may come a day when I no longer get a kick out of watching him do what he does, it is not this day.
xXx: The Return of Xander Cage clocks in at 107 minutes and is rated PG13 for "extended sequences of gunplay and violent action, and for sexual material."
It's not brain surgery, but The Return of Xander Cage is about as much fun as I can imagine having at the cinema. Of a possible nine Weasleys, xXx: The Return of Xander Cage gets seven.
Movie Catchup Day Two kicked off with Gold.
Against all odds, a down-on-his-luck prospector and a geologist strike gold in Indonesia.
Initially, Gold appeared to be another potential awards goldmine (see what I did there?) for Matthew McConaughey, but his loony performance doesn't help this too-talky tale get off the ground. McConaughey underwent another extreme physical transformation to portray Kenny Wells, a doughy dude with a receding hairline, and nothing says "Oscar bait" like a handsome actor who looks nothing like himself in a based-on-a-true-story role. Sadly, neither the performance nor the picture is very memorable, and Wells' appearance is played mostly for mean-spirited laughs. Edgar Ramirez is the film's highlight, understated as Wells' partner Michael Acosta. The picture moves slowly and is never really that interesting, thanks to unlikable characters and twists that can be seen a mile out. Ultimately it's a nasty little tale about greed and willful cluelessness, The Wolf of Wall Street without the gripping relevance.
Gold runs 121 minutes and is rated R for "language throughout and some sexuality/nudity."
Gold is a dull, disappointing movie with little to recommend it. Of a possible nine Weasleys, Gold gets four.
Fangirl points: An Iron Maiden t-shirt is pretty prominent in one important scene. This is not a drill: an Iron Maiden t-shirt is in the movie!
The final installment on the weekend's busy schedule: Oscar hopeful Lion.
A young man who was lost as a child in India, then adopted by an Australian couple, searches for his birth family.
Lion is a moving true story of love and, if we're being honest, not a little good fortune. The film points out that over 80,000 children go missing in India each year, but this is a story about one of the lucky ones. Lost and miles from home, Saroo faces many threats to his well-being before being adopted by a childless, loving Australian couple. The setup drags on too long, and, for my money, the film would have been better served if it were trimmed a bit and/or spent more time on the young man's search for his birth family and less on the travails of his younger self. Having said that, newcomer Sunny Pawar is delightful and absolutely heartbreaking as the younger Saroo, owning the screen like a seasoned pro. Early scenes of his time on the streets are tense and uncomfortable, but effective. Nicole Kidman and David Wenham are almost too good to be true as the boy's adoptive parents, challenges touched on but mostly airbrushed like an unfortunate wrinkle before botox. (Sorry, Nicole.) As grownup Saroo delves ever more deeply into his search, Dev Patel is brilliant; eager and terrified, desperate for information, but hiding his intent from even those who might be able to help. It's a testament to the power of this story that, in an age where everyone seems to have forgotten how to behave appropriately at the cinema, there was nary a peep from my audience for the duration.
Lion clocks in at 118 minutes and is rated PG13 for "thematic material and some sensuality."
Lion is a sobering but uplifting tale of love and luck. Of a possible nine Weasleys, Lion gets seven.
An outing takes a sinister turn for three teenage friends (Anya Taylor-Joy,
Haley Lu Richardson, and Jessica Sula) when they are kidnapped by a ruthless
stranger (James McAvoy) and imprisoned in his basement. They soon learn that their
captor has multiple-personality disorder, forcing them to plot their escape
without ever knowing which of his 23 personas -- young or old, male or female,
benign or monstrous -- they will confront on the way out. Written and directed
by M. Night Shyamalan. ~ Violet LeVoit, Rovi
Director: M. Night Shyamalan
Cast: James McAvoy, Anya Taylor-Joy, Betty Buckley, Haley
Lu Richardson, Brad William Henke,
Sebastian Arcelus
Release Date: Jan
20, 2017
Rated PG-13 for Some Language, Disturbing Thematic
Content, Disturbing Behavior and Violence
Runtime: 1 hr. 57 min.
Genres: Horror, Suspense/Thriller
Review:
M. Night Shyamalan hasn’t made a good movie in a long
long while.I’ve personally found him to
be one of the most frustrating and annoying directors in recent memory.Typically his films have an interesting
premise but he can’t help but show us exactly how clever he thinks he is.Spilt suffers from similar issues.Shyamalan is helped greatly by some stellar
performances from James McAvoy and Anya Taylor-Joy.McAvoy is fully committed to the role and its
fun watching him switch through personalities with incredible ease.McAvoy’s role is the center piece but Anya
Taylor-Joy is nearly as impressive in a more subtle role.Taylor-Joy continues to impress after her
star making turn in last years The Witch.She displays some impressive talent that bodes well for her in the
future.Sadly, both performances can’t
save a messily made child abuse allegory.In a better filmmaker’s hand, this could have been a special film that
could have really taken advantage of the strong performances.Instead Shyamalan delivers a heavy handed
child abuse parable all the while sexualizing his young stars with some
outright creepy shots and plot devices.Like
every M. Night Shyamalan there’s a twist and a pointless cameo by the
director.The twist is entirely
inorganic and comes entirely out of left field, its sole purpose is to remind
audiences that Shyamalan made decent films a long time ago.
Dearest Blog: This weekend it was off to Marquee Cinemas for La La Land (finally!) and Live By Night.
Spoiler level here will be mild, nothing you wouldn't know from the trailers. I will offer thumbs-up or thumbs-down on endings, without divulging specifics; if that's more than you want to know, read no further until you've seen these.
First up: Oscar hopeful La La Land.
An aspiring actress and a jazz musician chase their dreams in Los Angeles.
Let it be noted, dear reader(s), that, from its first trailer, I've anticipated La La Land as a great movie and likely Best Picture winner. I generally love musicals, and--while romances aren't my favorite--who could resist a pairing as adorable as Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling? Certainly not I! Well...as it turns out, La La Land IS a great movie, and the probable Best Picture winner...but it's a lousy musical.
Getting the bad news out of the way first: La La Land features forgettable original tunes and unimaginative choreography. Neither Gosling nor Stone is a great singer, at least not as demonstrated here. (Stone has done Broadway, so I know she has to be better than this.) The musical numbers are exactly why some folks hate musicals: random songs dropped in mostly random places; there's no flow whatsoever. Finally, the movie has a disappointing finale that's so at odds with the rest it feels as if someone accidentally tacked on the ending of a different film. As La La Land's final impression, it casts a heavy shadow on the whole. (This is not a judgment of a happy or unhappy ending; it's about how the ending fits the rest of the picture.)
Having said all that, the good news is, there's lots of good news! La La Land is a compelling enough story that its musical failings are almost entirely forgivable. Stone and Gosling manage to out-cute Lawrence and Pratt as the movie year's most lovable couple, a feat I would have thought impossible. Remarkably, their weak singing voices play as part of a self-deprecating charm, and their characters' struggles and dreams should be relatable to just about anyone. La La Land boasts lovely production design and costumes, and there is one smokin' number, performed by John Legend, that even manages to break the movie's tired-old-showtunes mold.
La La Land clocks in at 128 minutes and is rated PG13 for "some language."
La La Land is a very good movie, a terrible musical, and a love letter to Los Angeles that fails to sell Los Angeles as anything worth loving.
Of a possible nine Weasleys, La La Land gets seven.
Next on the docket: Ben Affleck's mob thriller Live by Night.
A Boston mobster takes over Florida operations for a former rival.
By now you've probably heard enough negative commentary to guess Live by Night won't go down in the annals of legendary gangster movies. While that's probably true, that's not to say it isn't a worthwhile afternoon at the pictures.
Writer/director Affleck has created an interesting--if deliberately paced--story full of twists and turns. Per usual, he's crafted himself a role that plays to his stoic style and, while he does an admirable job, it's Sienna Miller who steals the show as his sometime girlfriend. If you're into mob movies in general, there are some...erm...offers people can't refuse, but the violence isn't overly graphic, and the movie never feels like a shoot 'em up where the story only occasionally interrupts.
Live by Night runs 128 minutes and is rated R for "strong violence, language throughout, and some sexuality/nudity."
Live by Night may not rank among the all-time great gangster pictures, but it's a well-executed tale with a satisfying payout.
Of a possible nine Weasleys, Live by Night gets six and a half.
Fangirl points: Christian Clemenson! Brendan Gleeson! Titus Welliver!
A young boy (Lewis MacDougall) befriends a wise tree monster (voiced by Liam
Neeson) while coping with bullying and the terminal illness of his mother
(Felicity Jones). He moves in with his grandmother (Sigourney Weaver) as his
mom's condition deteriorates, and uses his imagination and friendship with the
monster to escape reality. J.A. Bayona (The Impossible) directed this fantasy
drama. ~ Daniel Gelb, Rovi
Director: Juan Antonio Bayona
Cast: Felicity Jones, Sigourney Weaver, Liam Neeson, Toby
Kebbell, Ben Moor, Lewis MacDougall
Release Date: Dec
23, 2016
Rated PG-13 for Thematic Content and Some Scary Images
Runtime: 1 hr. 48 min.
Genres: Drama, Sci-Fi/Fantasy
Review:
Juan Antonio Bayona’s A Monster Calls is an interesting
fantasy parable with a very human message.Bayona crafts together a beautifully gothic tale with some impressive
visual flourishes peppered in throughout.Its pace is decidedly measured and methodical throughout.It might be a turnoff to some because it does
move at snail’s pace during large portions of the film.The monster and his tales are wonderfully
animated through lush water colored animation which is as striking as it is
effective. The cast lead by Lewis MacDougall is stellar through out and you’d
think with the bigger names in the film, MacDougall might get lost in the
shuffle but he never does. He turns in an impressive performance filled with
melancholy and visible pain.Its finale
delivers a simple and
straightforward lesson but do so with a strong emotional
punch sure to leave many in tears.
