MOVIE REVIEW: BORDERLANDS

 

Returning to her home planet Pandora, an infamous bounty hunter forms an unexpected alliance with a ragtag team of misfits. Together, they battle alien monsters and dangerous bandits to uncover one of Pandora's most explosive secrets.

Director: Eli Roth

Cast: Cate Blanchett, Kevin Hart, Jack Black, Édgar Ramírez, Ariana Greenblatt, Florian Munteanu, Gina Gershon, Jamie Lee Curtis

Release Date: August 9, 2024

Genre: Action, Adventure, Comedy, Sci-Fi, Thriller

Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of violence and action, language and some suggestive material.

Runtime: 1h 42m

Review:

Borderlands isn't the worst film I've seen this year, but it is the most generic and tiring thing splashed onscreen thus far.  Everything about Eli Roth's film feels like a rehash of other far better films.  Its continuously loud and over the top to the point of exhaustion with the uneven special effects killing any campy fun that might be had.  The story is straightforward and simplistic, which should be more than enough for the top notch cast to deliver some semblance of fun onscreen.  Sadly, there are only a few fleeting moments of life and fun scattered throughout the film's brisk runtime.  Cate Blanchett swaggers onscreen with a self assured confidence that makes her the most interesting person onscreen at any given time due to the sheer fact that an actress of her caliber is trying to carry this shlocky, soulless film decked out in full anime cosplay.  She seems to have a good time as she recites clunky lines of dialogue with a devil may care detachment which shows she's more than game to go full camp throughout.  Unfortunately, everybody else onscreen is annoying or obnoxious, specifically Ariana Greenblatt and Jack Black being particularly grating.   Only Kevin Hart appears to be comfortable in this sphere, but his character is written as the straight man for some confounding reason.  Édgar Ramírez and Jamie Lee Curtis are both over the top but their characters, much like everyone else onscreen are so underwritten that they barely register.  Borderlands is the type of film that will end up in heavy rotation on TNT/TBS weekend loops serving as little more than background noise.   

D

MOVIE REVIEW: THANKSGIVING

 

An axe-wielding maniac terrorizes residents of Plymouth, Mass., after a Black Friday riot ends in tragedy. Picking off victims one by one, the seemingly random revenge killings soon become part of a larger, sinister plan.

Director: Eli Roth

Cast: Patrick Dempsey, Addison Rae, Milo Manheim, Jalen Thomas Brooks, Nell Verlaque, Rick Hoffman, Gina Gershon

Release Date: November 17, 2023

Genre: Horror, Mystery, Thriller

Rated R for strong bloody horror violence and gore, pervasive language and some sexual material.

Runtime: 1h 46m

Eli Roth's Thanksgiving is a gleeful, holiday themed slasher that's unabashedly campy as it delivers creative blood and gore but little else.  Roth uses the framework of most Scream movies to set up a murder mystery to propel the plot forward.  He's obviously not terribly concerned with the story or characters as much as he is with getting to his blood splattered set pieces.  Those set pieces are perfectly exemplified by the Black Friday riot which opens the film and should give the audience a clear warning about what's coming down the road.  Its manically frenetic and silly especially as the blood starts to spurt in increasingly outlandish and silly manners.  Roth, for his part, lays all his cards out on the table from the start but the film struggles to maintain that manic energy it starts with as we are introduced to a fairly bland crop of fresh faced fodder for the axe.  The central group collection of characters barely registers as one dimensional which makes it a bit hard to get invested in any of them as they spew out rather banal dialogue which is happy to use buzz words as flair.  There’s no big expectation of character development in slashers but this group feels particularly interchangeable and disposable.  Patrick Dempsey, Gina Gershon and Rick Hoffman add some credibility to the production with Dempsey getting the most screen time.  Dempsey understands the assignment and is clearly having a great time throughout playing the local sheriff with a wink and a nod.  On the other hand, it’s a bit confusing that Gershon and Hoffman were cast and then given practically nothing meaningful to do which is a missed opportunity.  As is, Thanksgiving is a fun but mostly disposable slasher film which will probably end up a cult classic simply because of the seasonal theme more so than overall quality.

C+