Cindy Prascik's Review of The Meg

Dearest Blog: Yesterday it was off to Marquee Cinemas for The Meg.

 

Spoiler level here will be mild, nothing you wouldn't know from the trailers or if you've seen one of these kinds of monster movies before...ever.

 

It's Statham vs. giant shark, and the winner is the box office!

 

Ladies and gentlemen, there's not a lot in this world that gets me more wound up than a new Jason Statham movie, and while sometimes he seems to go out of his way to prove I'll watch him in absolutely anything, this one's not so bad.

 

Let's get the negatives out of the way first: The Meg has its tense moments, but it's not super exciting. Part of the problem is the film is utterly lacking in surprises; every minute plays out exactly how you'd expect, making it feel longer than it is. The cast does the best it can with some truly awful dialogue, and, while my crowd seemed to enjoy the cheap laughs, I rolled my eyes so hard I'm surprised I'm not typing out the back of my head today. Finally, a giant, prehistoric shark should be about the most imposing thing you ever could see, yet somehow it never really earns a 50-foot screen; in fact, it seemed positively puny compared to the Bumblebee trailer that ran before.

 

Now the good news: Obviously: Jason Statham. I was afraid the large-ish cast would mean not enough Statham, but even if he's sharing the screen he's still on the screen most of the time. Win! The rest of the cast is pretty good and does what it can with the material; the fact that sometimes it's not much is never their fault. Regular reader(s) will know I'm no great fan of kids or kid actors, but flat-out adorable Shuya Sophia Cai steals this show right out from under its adult ensemble. The scramble for a PG13 rating kept blood and gore well within reason, too. (Yes, I know some would have put that in the "negatives" paragraph!) The Meg is a decent bit of fun buoyed by a good cast and some pretty scenery, even if it's too silly and drags on a bit at times.

 

The Meg clocks in at 113 minutes and is rated PG13 for "action/peril, bloody images, and some language." The Meg is just the sort of unremarkable brain candy you'd expect from Hollywood this time of year. 

 

Of a possible nine Weasleys, The Meg gets six. 

 

Oh, and, for the record: "You should put on some clothes," is never, EVER the correct thing to say to Jason Statham.

 

Until next time...

MOVIE REVIEW: SUPER

ON VIDEO

SUPER



An average guy reacts to the frustration of losing his wife by adopting a crime-fighting persona known as the "Crimson Bolt," and targeting any criminal who crosses his path -- no matter how minor their infraction may be. Frank (Rainn Wilson) is husband to former alcoholic and drug addict Sarah (Liv Tyler), and he loves her with all his heart. Their wedding day was one of but two perfect moments in this Frank's life, but when Sarah runs away with charismatic drug dealer Jacques (Kevin Bacon), the loss was just too much for her mild-mannered husband to take. Subsequently transforming himself into the Crimson Bolt, Frank reasons that if he can take down Jacques along with the rest of the city's scum, his beloved wife will soon come running back. With his homemade suit and his handy pipe wrench, Frank goes to work cleaning up the streets and starts making headlines. But just as the Crimson Bolt becomes the talk of the town, sociopathic comic-store clerk Libby (Ellen Page) reinvents herself as "Boltie," and makes a play to become the controversial street hero's trusted sidekick. Perhaps by working together, the Crimson Bolt and Boltie can make an example of Jacques, and keep the streets safe for average citizens. But real life isn't like comic books, and sometimes when an average person tries to be a superhero, things can go very bad, very fast. ~ Jason Buchanan, Rovi
Director: James Gunn

Cast: Rainn Wilson, Ellen Page, Liv Tyler, Kevin Bacon, Michael Rooker

Release Date: Apr 01, 2011

Rated R for strong bloody violence, pervasive language, sexual content
& drug use

Runtime: 1 hr. 36 min.

Genres: Art House, Comedy, Superhero

REVIEW:

James Gunn has shown a talent for a twisted sort of humor and a love for fanboy genres. His 2006 film Slither was a wonderful homage to classic 80’s creature features that people like me just loved. Super tries something similar with superheroes, it suffers from a variety of issues first and foremost Kick Ass having recently and successfully traversed the same path beforehand. At this point it’s almost impossible to avoid the comparisons. Still taken on its own merits Super just misses more than it doesn’t. You get the sense the heart of a good strong idea is in there somewhere but it never comes to fruition. The film just lacks any sense of rhythm or cohesion. It’s a real shame because there’s a strong cast assembled and everybody seems game. Rainn Wilson turns in a believable performance throughout. Ellen Page is mildly unhinged and kind of fun in limited screen time. Kevin Bacon and Nathan Fillion are criminally underused, a shame since more screen time for both of their characters might have helped the film. Liv Tyler and Michael Rooker show up but aren’t really asked to do much. While I’m sure Gunn’s heart was in the right place Super just feels like a massive misfire.

C-