Cindy Prascik's Reviews of Marvel's Eternals & Hotel Transylvania: Transformania

 

My dear reader(s): This weekend I was able to catch up with a couple titles I'd very much been looking forward to, Marvel's Eternals and Hotel Transylvania: Transformania.

Spoiler level here will be mild, just a small, non-plot-specific comment on HT4.

First up: Marvel's Eternals.

D-List Marvel heroes attempt to save the world whilst navigating their own personal soap operas.

'Kayyyyyyy...first I want to say I didn't hate Eternals as much as many seemed to, and I didn't think it was any worse than most Marvel content. There were a few specific things I liked, and more that I didn't like, and for whatever that is worth to you, my dear reader(s), here they are.

The pros:

Richard Madden. I've been taking a pass on a good many comic book movies these days, but there was no chance I was missing a movie with Richard Madden. With Richard Madden in tights, no less. Happy days!

An interesting and diverse cast. Perhaps the most diverse of any costumed hero flick to date. We love to see it.

(Spoiler) turning up in the mid-credits scene. If you're online at all, ever, you probably know, but I won't divulge it here. Suffice to say I squealed even though I knew it was coming.

A couple truly unexpected (at least by me) developments. Mostly Eternals doesn't reinvent the wheel, but there were a few times I thought, whoa, did not see *that* coming!

The potential for some of these characters to get very interesting, assumimg they get some space in a less-crowded future film. The possibility is there. We'll see what they do with it.

The cons:

Eternals is too long, easily by 30 minutes, maybe more. Way too much filler. BUT...

...it also fails to explain most characters fully enough for non-comic readers. No one here is Captain America; the casual viewer could do with an abridged history and explanation of powers for these folks.

Most of the dialogue is awkwardly written and badly delivered, and the story is messy and borrows too much from other genre pictures.

Some of the effects are inexpicably sketchy for such a big-budget effort, and, finally...

...despite their potential, *this* movie didn't make me interested enough in any of these characters to care if I ever see them again. (I'm interested enough in a couple of the actors to care a lot, but that's another matter altogether.)

Marvel's Eternals clocks in at 156 minutes and is rated PG13 for "fantasy violence and action, some language, and brief sexuality."

Eternals is another forgettable bit of fun from Marvel, but it suffers for its bloated runtime, lack of familiar heroes, and failure to flesh out new faces. Of a possible nine Weasleys, Marvel's Eternals gets four and a half.

Marvel's Eternals is now streaming on Disney+.

Next on my weekend agenda: Hotel Transylvania: Transformania.

Van Helsing's Monsterfication Ray turns humans to monsters and monsters to humans.

The fourth installment in the Hotel Transylvania series caused me to utter perhaps the strangest words that have ever come out of my mouth: "I hope this is still good without Adam Sandler!" Drac here is voiced by one Brian Hull. I'm not a fan of Sandler and I'm not 100% sure I'd have noticed the difference if I hadn't known beforehand, but - armed with the knowledge - something definitely felt off with the new Drac. That being said, the HT movies are among my favorites, and I enjoyed this installment quite a bit.

Many faves from the previous films have returned here: Steve Buscemi, Keegan-Michael Key, David Spade, Molly Shannon, Selena Gomez, and Andy Samberg, to name a few. What initially seemed like a limited spooky premise has been parlayed into movies that tell pretty different stories. This one is good fun with a nice message about valuing people for who they are, not who you want them to be. The animation is cute and colorful, if nothing groundbreaking. Transformania plays like a finale, and if it is, it's a good one. If they choose to make more, well...I'll be first in line, despite the fact that this Drac (spoiler alert) really doesn't say, "Blah blah blah." Not even once. *sadface*

Hotel Transylvania: Transformania runs 98 minutes and is rated PG for "some action and rude humor, including cartoon nudity." (Seriously, I didn't make that up.)

Hotel Transylvania: Transformania is a dopey good time for the whole family. Of a possible nine Weasleys, Hotel Transylvania: Transformania gets seven.

Hotel Transylvania: Transformania is now streaming on Amazon Prime.

Until next time...

MOVIE REVIEW: SCREAM

 

Twenty-five years after a streak of brutal murders shocked the quiet town of Woodsboro, Calif., a new killer dons the Ghostface mask and begins targeting a group of teenagers to resurrect secrets from the town's deadly past.

Director: Matt Bettinelli-Olpin, Tyler Gillett

Cast: David Arquette, Neve Campbell, Courteney Cox, Melissa Barrera, Jenna Ortega, Jack Quaid, Dylan Minnette, Mason Gooding, Jasmin Savoy Brown, Mikey Madison, Sonia Ben Ammar, Marley Shelton, Skeet Ulrich, Heather Matarazzo, Roger L. Jackson

Release Date: January 14, 2022

Genre: Horror, Mystery, Thriller

Rated R for strong bloody violence, language throughout and some sexual references

Runtime: 1h 54m

Review:

Wes Craven's original Scream was a nice bit of self referential satire on slasher films.  It's the type of film that would have been better served if its subsequent sequels never existed.  It's heavy meta approach wasn't ever all that clever, Craven had done it before with his series send off for Freddy Krueger with New Nightmare.  As the film's have progressed the self reflection and satire has slowly devolved into self parody.  This fifth entry from directors Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett is unintentionally funny in parts and rarely if ever scary to any tangible degree.  The script riffs on elevated horror here and there while being a prime example of why most of the slasher genre is dead and buried.  They are clearly fans of the genre but they deliver some uninspired, bland and mildly boring bits of what can barely be called horror.  The kills are fairly rudimentary with them choosing brutally over creating any palpable sense of tension.  David Arquette, Neve Campbell and Courteney Cox all return with varying degrees of impact with even certain moments that should register emotionally falling flat.  Melissa Barrera, Jenna Ortega and Jack Quaid do the heavy lifting for the better part of the film with Quaid being the only who seems to be having a good time.  Barrera is surprisingly flat with her eyebrows leaving the biggest impression on the film.  The who done it at play here sadly isn't all the complex or terribly intriguing as it tries to make a point about toxic fandom.  This fifth entry feels like it should be the last in the series and probably for good reason.

D

Cindy Prascik's Ten Things I Loved About Movies in 2021

 

My dearest reader(s), I hope 2022 is treating you well so far.

In 2021, I (sadly) didn't see enough movies to offer a credible Top Ten list. As you know, my lists that include Hotel Transylvania movies are basically the Bible for serious film lovers. Instead, here I'll offer ten things in/about movies that made me happy in 2021.

Since the year has ended and those who wish have had ample opportunity to see everything mentioned, beware: Here there be spoilers.

10. Movie Musicals. I'm a great fan of the theatre, and musical theatre in particular. While I didn't think every effort translated particularly well to the screen (lookin at YOU, In the Heights), the number of new and noteworthy movie musicals last year was encouraging.

9. Justice League Corrected. "The Snyder Cut" was such a vast improvement over the theatrical release of Justice League (though I didn't hate that as much as many) that — had it been released originally — it might have saved the Batfleck DC Universe. Ever shall I remain sad it was not.

8. Cruella Hair, Makeup, & Costumes. Even if the picture weren't terrific (it is) Disney's Cruella is worth a look for the style alone.

7. Why Did I Watch This Again? Last year I saw new movies featuring my faves Gary Oldman (Crisis/the Woman in the Window/the Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard), Sebastian Stan (Monday), and Jason Statham (Wrath of Man/F9). I mean, they weren't particularly *good* movies, but...needs must and all.

6. Welcome, Eros! And speaking of faves... 2021 was the Year of Harry Styles here, and, after months of whispers, he finally and actually turned up in a certain big-budget costumed-hero flick. Be still, my Harry Heart!

5. Judas and the Black Messiah. Important history we weren't taught in school. If entertainment is the way to make it known, then may entertainment keep doing so as forcefully as this.

4. AGarf. Andrew Garfield deserved an Oscar for the Social Network. He wasn't even nominated. I haven't forgiven the Academy. 2021 might give him another shot with tick...tick...BOOM! Any movie is better for having him, so do look him up in Eyes of Tammy Faye and Spider-Man: No Way Home as well.

3. Christmas Spirit! I love Christmas. It's no Halloween, but it's not such a poor second. Only one movie really captured the Christmas spirit this year, A Boy Called Christmas. A new Father Christmas origins story, it's different enough to be interesting and traditional enough to be perfect for that time of year when people tend to dive headlong into their traditions. A great cast and stunning locations also make it a must-see!

2. Attention to Detail. My top two mentions are (unsurprisingly) both for Edgar Wright movies. In Wright's Last Night in Soho, a character is listening to the song Downtown from Petula Clark's 1965 album Downtown. The actor could have dropped the needle anywhere on the disc and pretty much no one would have noticed or cared, but she sets it down in the correct spot where the song appears on that album. I loved that so much I've kept a note on my phone in case an opportunity to mention it arose. (I may need a hobby.)

1. Let the Sparks Fly! Edgar Wright's documentary, the Sparks Brothers, was easily my favorite movie of the year, and one of the best things about it is people's (especially fellow musicians') enthusiasm and devotion for and to the group. It is an engaging and uplifting experience that I can — and do — watch again and again!

I'll close this with a promise to try to do better as far as seeing movies in 2022. At the very least, I'll be off to a good start when Hotel Transylvania 4 hits Prime Video this week!

Until next time...

MOVIE REVIEW: THE 355

 

CIA agent Mason "Mace" Brown joins forces with a rival German agent, a cutting-edge computer specialist and a Colombian psychologist when a top-secret weapon falls into the hands of a group of mercenaries. Together, the four women embark on a breakneck mission to save the world while staying one step ahead of a mysterious figure who's tracking their every move.

Director: Simon Kinberg

Cast: Jessica Chastain, Penélope Cruz, Fan Bingbing, Diane Kruger, Lupita Nyong'o, Édgar Ramírez, Sebastian Stan

Release Date: January 7, 2022 

Action, Thriller

Rated PG-13 for sequences of strong violence, brief strong language, and suggestive material.

Runtime: 2h 4m

Review:

The 355 is stacked with star power that makes its generic spy thriller worlds more watchable and enjoyable than it deserves to be.  Simon Kinberg's film has a generic quality about it that makes it almost indistinguishable from troves of similar films.  Exotic locales and large action set pieces aren't terribly memorable but they're entertaining as mindless junk food. Jessica Chastain leads the cast ably as a believable action star but it's hardly just her show.  The film is an impressive ensemble piece with Lupita Nyong'o, Diane Kruger, Penélope Cruz and Fan Bingbing all getting ample screen time to shine.  Their chemistry together is ultimately what makes the whole thing work in spite of the scripts hacky shortcomings.  They are believable as a group of ass kicking spies with smaller moments fleshing out their characters.  Its a testament to their assembled talents that this works as well as it does with such a generic story and cliched MacGuffin and villain, the film gives Sebastian Stan woefully little to do.  The 355 offers up the kind of mindless popcorn fun which offers up female empowerment without ever beating you over the head with it.

B-

My 10 Favorite Films of 2021

2021 was another strange and challenging year for the big screen. We saw a slow rollout of film's delayed from 2020 with mixed results.  

Comic book film still rule the box office roost for the most part and helped soften the hit from some big name projects that just couldn't gain any traction.  

Ultimately, I reviewed 76 films this year with some surprises and letdowns along the way.  This top ten reflects my favorite films which may or may not be reflective of my original grade.  

Some of these films stuck in my mind long after I'd seen them while others left an immediate impression.  

So without further adieu, here are my ten favorite films of 2021 in no particular order.  

Saint Maud 

Rose Glass' debut film is an efficient and affecting slow burn of a psychological horror film.  It all hinges on a haunting performance from Morfydd Clark which culminates with a final act that will leave you shaken.

The Night House 

Rebecca Hall is the type of performer that's capable of delivering stellar turns when she's given the right material (See 2016's Christine).  The Night House is a meditation on grief and loss in the guise of a horror film.  Hall elevates the film with her singular turn as the widowed wife.

Nightmare Alley 

Guillermo del Toro's remake of Nightmare Alley is lavish but dense film which is no rush to get anywhere quickly.  Anyone with a short attention span is likely to hate it but those that stick with it will find a beautifully macabre morality tale.  Del Toro's style radiates through each meticulously constructed scene.  Bradley Cooper plays against type with great effect but Cate Blanchett own the back half of the film.

The Eyes of Tammy Faye

This film is a prime example of performances being better than the actual film.  Jessica Chastain has gotten a lot of buzz for her turn and it's justified but Andrew Garfield is just as good. They make this paint by the numbers biopic far more watchable than it deserves to be.

Belfast

Kenneth Branagh puts down Poirot's mustache to deliver a personal, moving and heartwarming film.  Regardless of where you grew up there are universal themes that come through the film's narrative making it an uplifting experience.

Last Night in Soho

Edgar Wright's latest film is a dazzling technical marvel especially in its stellar first half.   Anya Taylor-Joy and Thomasin Mckenzie both deliver engaging performances in this kaleidoscope of a film which takes you on a journey and features the late Diana Rigg's cinematic swan song.

The Tragedy of Macbeth 

Joel Coen's The Tragedy of Macbeth is a striking minimalist adaptation of Shakespeare's legendary play.  The visuals leave a lasting impression with their stark staging which linger in your memory long afterward.  Denzel Washington and Frances McDormand provide one of the best Macbeth and Lady Macbeth in recent memory.  

The Last Duel

Ridley Scott's The Last Duel is a period piece with some heavy subject matter.  Scott delivers a well constructed adult drama utilizing a Rashômon approach to the events in question.  Its a difficult watch in parts but the film is populated with excellent actors (excuse Affleck's boyband hair) delivering engaging performances about a timely subject matter.  

The Suicide Squad

Apologizes to Spider-Man: Far from Home but James Gunn's gonzo The Suicide Squad was far and away the most fun I had with a comic book movie this year.  It's vulgar, over the top but also has enough heart  (and daddy issues) to make you care about the characters.  The set pieces are great fun but nothing tops Harley's compound escape with poetic mayhem.

Cruella

I'd be lying if I said I went into Disney's latest live action redo with any sort of expectation.  Most have been so-so money grabs but at least Cruella had Emma Stone who typically make most things better.  The biggest surprise here wasn't that she was great but that the film itself was worlds better than it deserved to be.  Its an edgy mash up of Tim Burton's sensibility with Lady Gaga's fashion sense, kudos to Disney for letting them make this film.  

Honorable Mentions

Dune 

My main take away from David Lynch's 1984 Dune was a floating fat man.  Needless to say I didn't have any deep affinity or affection for Dune onscreen or as a book.  Denis Villeneuve's new take was visually arresting and engaging even though it hit on plenty of origin story beats.  There's a geeky joy watching a sci-fi story treated with such reverence and care.

Titane

Some films work to subtly unleash hints of insanity before unleashing it full bore onto the audience.  Julia Ducournau's Titane doesn't bother with any pretense and lets its freak flag fly in the first ten minutes of its runtime.  You're either all in or out of business with it midway through the first act.  The story goes is unexpected, bizarre directions occasionally recalling some of Cronenberg's early work.  Regardless of what you think of the film as a whole, you aren't going to forget it for a longtime.  

Lamb 

A24 continue it's string of delivering some of most interesting "horror" films in recent memory.  Lamb doesn't play like a straight up horror film instead it feels more like a long forgotten folktale anchored by a fantastic turn from a fully committed Noomi Rapace.

West Side Story

This remake from Steven Spielberg has no reason being as good as it is.  Spielberg pulls off an impressive bit of cinematic alchemy by making a classic musical fresh with minor tweaks, amazing dance numbers and memorable performances.  Hopefully more audiences will take the time to see this film and truly appreciate what Spielberg pulled off.

Werewolves Within

Who would have thought a good videogame adaptation would have popped up without any fuzz or fanfare.  Loosely based on the game of the same name, Werewolves Within takes 1985's Clue premise and adds in a tad bit more gore and fangs.  Excellent performances from the ensemble is sure to make this a cult classic in the years to come.   

Special Mention 

Zack's Snyder's Justice League 

It's the film that should have come out in 2017 and it only saw the light of day because of dedicated fans.  Snyder's DC opus does everything right that the theatrical cut got wrong.  Snyder's cut is beefy and surprisingly character centric which gives the film heart that was sorely from the theatrical cut which was cobbled together like a cinematic Frankenstein.