MOVIE REVIEW: MARRY ME

 

Pop superstar Kat Valdez is about to get married before an audience of her loyal fans. However, seconds before the ceremony, she learns about her fiance's cheating ways and has a meltdown on stage. In a moment of inspired insanity, Kat locks eyes with a total stranger in the crowd and marries him on the spot. As forces conspire to separate the unlikely newlyweds, they must soon decide if two people from such different worlds can find true love together.

Director: Kat Coiro

Cast: Jennifer Lopez, Owen Wilson, John Bradley, Sarah Silverman, Chloe Coleman

Release Date: February 11, 2022 

Genre: Comedy, Music, Romance

Rated PG-13 for some language and suggestive material

Runtime: 1h 52m

Review:

Marry Me is a preposterous rom-com that takes the general idea of Notting Hill and updates it with a modern spin.  Kat Coiro's film doesn't break any new ground but it's a breezy surprisingly likeable rom-com.  There's honestly no good reason for this film to be as watchable as it is almost in spite of itself.  Jennifer Lopez and Owen Wilson do most of the heavy lifting with both turning in charming and likable turns as the two leads.  There is a bit of real life synergy with some elements of the script veering close to some of Lopez's past relationships which makes her performance feel more grounded and authentic.  Wilson is his usual likable self with him and Lopez having a good rapport together even if they don't quite sizzle with romantic chemistry.  The film suffers from structural issues which are ingrained into the genre with the situations getting more and more ridiculous as the film heads into it's finale.  Marry Me doesn't change the genre but it doesn't really try to instead it just has fun with it's ludicrous conceit and runs with it.  

B-

MOVIE REVIEW: DEATH ON THE NILE

 

Belgian sleuth Hercule Poirot's Egyptian vacation aboard a glamorous river steamer turns into a terrifying search for a murderer when a picture-perfect couple's idyllic honeymoon is tragically cut short.

Director: Kenneth Branagh

Cast:  Kenneth Branagh, Tom Bateman, Annette Bening, Russell Brand, Ali Fazal, Dawn French, Gal Gadot, Armie Hammer, Rose Leslie, Emma Mackey, Sophie Okonedo, Jennifer Saunders, Letitia Wright

Release Date: February 11, 2022 

Genre: Crime, Drama, Mystery

Rated PG-13 for violence, some bloody images, and sexual material

Runtime: 2h 7m

Review:

Death on the Nile is another lavish follow up to Murder on the Orient Express stacked with stars and style.  Kenneth Branagh is again pulling double duty in front and behind the camera with his love of the material shining thru each moment.  Branagh for his part adds a bit of sensitivity and heart to his turn as Poirot this go around.  The cast is each given their moment to shine with Annette Bening, Sophie Okonedo and Emma Mackey leaving the biggest impression.  The film's pacing is meticulous and measured as we meet all the potential suspects but it falters as the film hits the third act and the bodies continue to pile up with Poirot failing to live up to his legendary detective status.  Death on the Nile is the type of film that works well with in parts but is ultimately an uneven experience especially considering the collected star power behind and in front of the camera.

B

MOVIE REVIEW: JACKASS FOREVER

 

Celebrate the joy of a perfectly executed shot to the groin as Johnny Knoxville, Steve-O and the rest of the gang return for another round of hilarious, wildly absurd and often dangerous displays of stunts and comedy.

Director: Jeff Tremaine

Cast:  Johnny Knoxville, Steve-O, Chris Pontius, Dave England, Wee Man, Danger Ehren, Preston Lacy

Release Date: February 4, 2022 

Genre: Documentary, Action, Comedy

Rated R for strong crude material and dangerous stunts, graphic nudity and language throughout

Runtime: 1h 36m

Review:

If you buy a ticket to a Jackass movie you should have a good idea about what you are walking into.  Jackass Forever comes ten years after the last installment and the cast members all look older even though they attack all their stunts with adolescent zeal that's insane and impressive.  The stunts are well timed with very few of them overstaying their welcome.  If you enjoy this series you'll find plenty to like here with some sequences leaving a gut busting impression.  There is nary a semblance of plot or cohesive narrative which plays in perfectly with it's low fi origins.  If there is a minor drawback it's that the stronger and funnier skits come earlier in the film top loading the laughs.  It's not a huge issue since the film moves a brisk pace with little to no lags in the hijinks.  

B

MOVIE REVIEW: MOONFALL

 

The world stands on the brink of annihilation when a mysterious force knocks the moon from its orbit and sends it hurtling toward a collision course with Earth. With only weeks before impact, NASA executive Jocinda "Jo" Fowler teams up with a man from her past and a conspiracy theorist for an impossible mission into space to save humanity.

Director: Roland Emmerich

Cast: Halle Berry, Patrick Wilson, John Bradley, Michael Peña, Charlie Plummer, Kelly Yu, Donald Sutherland

Release Date: 2h 10m

Genre: Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi

Rated PG-13 for violence, disaster action, strong language, and some drug use

Runtime: 2h 10m

Review:

Roland Emmerich's latest sci-fi disaster film is a campy busy mess of a film that never embraces it's overall absurdity and just have fun with it.  Emmerich's film feels more like a relic from the early 2000s with it's tired redemption arches and shoehorned product placement. Halle Berry, Patrick Wilson and John Bradley do the majority of the heavy lifting with the main story thread.  Patrick Wilson does the best he can with the material but at least he doesn't phone it in like Halle Berry who looks like she's just a collecting a paycheck here.  John Bradley is likeable as the conspiracy nerd and he seems to be the only one who's having a good time.  A secondary story thread drags the entire film down with a pointless earthbound subplot dealing with the leads kids and some overly persistent thieves.  That subplot is as ludicrous as it is boring and could probably have been excised from the film altogether and streamlined the story.  A third act reveal is a goofy fun but thematically interesting even if the movie doesn't explore it in any sort of depth.  Moonfall is the type of film that will run on cable endlessly which will make for perfect background noise.  

C-